


Coming home to you

by BellaLovesBooks



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Fluff, Homophobia, I should be sleeping, M/M, Tiny bit of Angst, drunk baz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-30
Updated: 2017-01-30
Packaged: 2018-09-20 22:23:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9518582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BellaLovesBooks/pseuds/BellaLovesBooks
Summary: Simon comes back to mummers tower to find a very drunk Baz. Fluff and making out ensues.





	

Watford felt cold and empty, what with everyone having gone home for Christmas. I sighed, my breath escaping in a foggy cloud.

After Agatha broke up with me, we agreed that it would be too awkward if I came home with her, and Penny’s mum didn’t want me at her house what with the whole situation with the Mage. Like I’d get them in trouble. 

I slowly climbed mummers tower, dragging my feet and bashing my shoulder into the wall. I didn’t usually miss the family I never had, until holidays rolled around and I was all alone. 

I allowed myself the simple pleasure of letting the door crash open (Baz hates it when I do it; He says I’m going to break the door down. Like he couldn’t fix it in an instant.) Someone swore loudly, and I jumped. I had thought I was alone.

I looked up; Baz was sprawled on the floor, leaning against his bed. I sighed in irritation. Then I blinked in surprise. Why was he still here? Everyone else was long gone.

“Why are you here?” I asked, swinging my bag off my back and onto my bed.

“S’my room too.” He replied sullenly, but his voice was off. 

“When are you going home, I meant.” He shrugged lazily.

“M’not. No room for a gay son in my house. No room for a gay son in my family, either.” He laughed, and something was definitely wrong. There was a long pause as I processed this. Baz was gay. Not that this bothered me; Who was I to care? Apparently, Baz’s family did, though. That bothered me. That bothered me a lot. 

Suddenly, I realised what was so off about him.

“Baz… Are you drunk?” I asked. He grinned sheepishly, and pulled out a half- empty bottle of spirits from behind his back.

“Where did you get that?” I gasped, and he giggled. I had never even heard him laugh before, and here he was giggling like a child. It was… Sweet, in a way.

“Christmas present from Fiona.” He said, and giggled again.

“Ok, Baz… I think you’ve had enough now,” I said, reaching for the bottle. He snatched it away, pouting.

“No, no no no,” he frowned, taking a swig. I sighed, and stepped past him to the bathroom.

“Wait,” he said, and grabbed my sleeve. I looked at him, and he patted the ground beside him clumsily.  
“Sit with me. Please, Si-Snow? Sit with me?” He slurred, and smiled innocently at me. It was the first time I had seen him smile properly, not smirking or smiling sarcastically. It brightened his face and made him look… I don’t know, freer somehow, younger. Happier. It was a good look for him.

He tugged at my sleeve again, and I sat down beside him. He offered me the bottle, and I took a swig, wincing at the burning taste. 

“So… seeing as it’s just us for the next two weeks, we’re going to have to try and get along.” I said, and he blinked in confusion.

“I just think… We should pretend we don’t hate each other for the time being. Otherwise these holidays are going to suck.” To my surprise, he burst out laughing, closing his eyes and taking a sip from the bottle.

“What’s so funny?” I asked, confused. He shook his head, still laughing, and passed the bottle back to me. I took a sip.

“Don’t hate you. I never ever ever hated you, why would I hate you, you’re so…” He trailed off, and I blinked in surprise.

“You don’t hate me? Why not? You always act like you do,” I said, shocked, but I couldn’t help smiling slightly. He straightened up and glared at me, some of the old Baz back.

“Just because I’m as drunk as a horse doesn’t mean I’m going to tell you all my secrets.” He drawled haughtily, chin raised. Then he dissolved into giggles again, muttering about horses getting drunk. He was going to regret this tomorrow, and guess who’d be stuck taking care of his hangover.

I sighed in frustration. “Just- If you don’t hate me, why have you always acted like you did?” He didn’t look at me, taking a long swig.

“Because… It’s easier than the truth.” He whispered, looking down at his shoes. I shuffled closer, bending my neck to try and meet his eyes.

“Then… What is the truth?” I asked softly. He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. Suddenly he snorted, startling me.

“You’re gonna have’ta get me a lot more drunk if you think I’d tell you.. That.” He sneered. I hit my head against the bed in irritation, and he frowned at me.

“Fine. Fine.” I repeated. “Well, I’m going to go have a shower now-” He grabbed at my sleeve, eyes wide and pleading.

“N-no S-Si-Snow, stay. Please, you don’t understand. I can’t tell you, it’d ruin everything, you’d probably hate me even more, my family already hates me enough. ‘Don’t show your face here until you’ve straightened yourself out, Basilton,’ My father said to me. P-please stay, I’ll be nice, I promise.”

He sounded so sincere, so sad, I couldn’t just leave him. I sighed, and settled back down.

“Ok. I’ll stay. But only if you stop drinking now; You’ve had too much.” He beamed up at me, and handed me the bottle. His smile was so pure and genuine it made my heart stutter, and I turned away to put it in the closet to hide my blush.

When I turned around he was still smiling, and was patting the floor next to him. I sat down, sitting closer than before. Our arms brushed, and I felt goose bumps rise where his skin had brushed mine.

“Um, Baz? I just wanted to say that… There’s nothing wrong with being gay. Your dad’s wrong.” He sneered at me, though it seemed only half hearted.

“I know that.” He snapped, looking away, obviously uncomfortable. 

“And… I don’t know if you were wondering, you probably weren’t, but… It doesn’t bother me in the slightest.” He glanced at me, his face hopeful.

“It doesn’t?”

“No. It would be a bit hypocritical of me, wouldn’t it?” I swallowed, and looked away.  
“I’m bisexual.” It felt so good to say it, to get it out there. I hadn’t told anyone, not even Penny (Although, she probably knew anyway.) There was a silence, and I glanced at Baz, worried. His mouth was slack, and he was blinking rapidly. 

“Um… Baz? Are you ok?” I asked nervously, poking him. He started slightly at my touch, and laughed nervously, running a hand through his hair.

“Yeah. Yeah, m’great. Yeah. Sorry.” I laughed, partially in relief and partially at the wide grin on his face. There was a pause, before I remembered what I wanted to ask before.

“Baz… What exactly happened? With your father?” Immediately his face turned cloudy, and he turned his head away from me.

“Last week, he was ‘round so he came t’pick me up and g’out for dinner. I’d known for a long long time what I was, but I never thought I’d tell’im. Or anyone else. I don’t even know what happened, but I just… Blurted it out. There and then. And he got all quiet, and his face went all smooth like it does when he’s hiding his emotions. I learnt that off him, I use it all the time, ‘specially round you.  
Then, he said to me ‘Basilton. You’re just going through a faze. Find a nice girl, date a bit, you’ll soon work it out.’ And I considered just bowing down to him like I always do. It would’ve been so much easier if I had. But I didn’t. I said, polite as can be, ‘No, father. It’s not a faze, I’ve known for years ‘n years.’ And he just glared at me and said”  
Baz took a deep, raggedy breath.  
“Don’t bother comin' home 'til you’ve straightened yourself out. No room for a gay son in the family. Don’t try to contact us, don’t turn up at the house, unless you’re telling us that you're done with this ridiculous faze.”

There was a long silence, as I processed this. I turned my head slightly to look at Baz, not really knowing what to say. His shoulders were shaking, and I could hear muffled whimpers. His head was still turned away, but I could tell he was crying.

Cautiously, I reached out and wrapped my arm around him. He leaned into me, still shaking, his hand covering his eyes in shame. I rubbed small circles on his back, occasionally running my hand high enough to stroke his hair.  
His hair. I had wanted to touch it since… Forever, really. It was softer than I thought.

“Shhh, it’s ok. It’s ok now, you’re alright. I’m right here, it’s ok…” I murmured, and his breathing gradually slowed, until he was just hiccupping slightly.

“If that’s his attitude… Then he doesn’t deserve you Baz. He doesn’t deserve the privilege of knowing you, of being related to you, even of standing in the same room as you. And you deserve so much better than him.” I whispered, blushing slightly; The alcohol must be having an effect on me, too. He gave a watery chuckle before lifting his head and leaning it on my shoulder. I didn’t pull away from his touch, relishing it while I still could.

“At least I didn’t tell him the rest of it. He woulda gone bat shit crazy.” He chuckled.  
“What’s the rest of it?”  
“The truth.” He whispered, looking at me. I felt his heartbeat increase.  
“What’s the truth?” I breathed, and he seemed entranced. He stared into my eyes, heartbeat wild, matching pace with mine.

“Simon…” He swallowed. “I’m in love with you.” 

Oh.

He was in love with me? That couldn’t be right. All this time, I had thought my love for him had been unrequited. Now I was finding out it wasn’t, it was like a bomb had exploded in my mind, in my heart. I wasn't sure if I was dreaming or not.

I must have taken too long to react, because he blinked and rocked back, away from me.  
“Shit- Oh shit. I wasn’t meant to tell you- I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to- Shit, oh shit.” He was visibly panicking, and scrambled back away from me. I grabbed his wrist, allowing my smile to fully break out across my face. He blinked in confusion, and I pulled him back down, back down next to me.

“Baz… Baz I love you too. I didn't know that you felt the same.” I was laughing, and he sucked in a breath in shock.

“You.. You… You?” He stammered, eyes wide, and I nodded, still laughing.

And then the distance became too much, and I brought our faces together, brushing my lips against his. He shoved his face into mine, and I could taste alcohol on his breath, but it was ok because his arms were around me, his tongue was against mine and my hands were in his hair. We were kissing, properly kissing, laughing and kissing and crying and it was magical.

“You called me Simon.” I murmured against his lips, and he smiled. 

“Did not,” He snorted, and I pulled away slightly, my lips just centimeters from his. He pouted and moved to chase mine, but I pulled back even further, raising a brow in a poor imitation of him. "Simon," He whined, and I grinned. I leant forward and crushed our lips together again, tugging at his hair with one hand, the other arm snaking around his waist and pulling him closer. 

“I like it when you call me Simon,” I breathed against his lips, and he shivered.

“And I like it... When you kiss me, Simon Simon Simon," He slurred gazing up at me from underneath his lashes.

I laughed, kissing his forehead.

"Yeah? Well, you can have all the kisses you want." I told him. His smile was so wide it lit up the room, and he was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

**Author's Note:**

> School can go fuck itself.
> 
> Sorry.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed, feedback is welcome. Possibility that this may be continued...


End file.
